September 9, 2015

1999


Most likely summer, 1999.
I had just finished my second year at college and was home for summer vacation.
This was when I met Piri for the first time.
He was still very much a puppy. Not even a year old.
I was pretty young too.
20.

I used to dye my hair in various colors
and sweep the floors with my baggy pants.
That used to drive my mom crazy.
"Can't you wear more girly clothing?"
When she recently saw me wear "normal" pants she was so happy.
That was only just a few years ago.
Heh.

But this picture
it's already from 16 years ago.
Oh my where has the time gone.

I love being in my thirties more than my twenties
but every once in a blue moon
I do miss the days when
I was a bit more innocent
and not so aware about what being an actual adult meant and how sad this world can be.

I've been having some really difficult time trying to grapple with some things lately.
It's nothing serious, but just realizations that have been shaking some of my core beliefs and morals.
It's still all mumbo jumbo inside my head and I can't seem to organize my thoughts or feelings..
But it's been making me a bit sad, angry, tired and a bit obsessive as well.

Yangkyu knows I get this way sometimes.
Sometimes I'll watch TV or a movie or read a book based on real life events
and get so sucked into it so much so that I start to research and try to find out more about the people behind the real story.

Anyway,
there were days when our eyes were not so tainted
with ugly things
and were always so hopeful
and bright.

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